In Loving Memory

I wasn't sure if I was going to post this or not because it's hard to put these thoughts into words but I decided that I should.

On June 30^th, my dear Ojiichan (grandfather in Japanese) passed away. His health had been declining for many years now, but his suffering is now over. I love him and will miss him so much. It is unfortunate that by living so far away from Okinawa, the visits have been scattered over the years, but I was very blessed to spend 3 weeks there in March to spend much needed time by his side.

When my mother and I first walked into his hospital room and he saw me for the first time in 5 years, he covered his eyes and wept. It must be very hard to have to watch your grandchildren grow up from afar, but I knew that at that moment, he was just overjoyed to have me there and so was I. The Japanese language for the most part has been lost to me. When my family moved here to the states when I was 8 years old, I made the switch to English and never looked back. Until recently. I am so sad that I didn't try harder to make it a bigger deal to hang on to and had experienced the result when I visited my family and had to use non verbal language or my mom the translate to communicate. While I was sitting next to Ojiichan, I wanted so badly to tell him how much I love him and care about him and missed him and wanted him to get better. But during our many hours, every day visits, I sat in silence next to him. He was very sick and hardly spoke to anyone anyway but I started to notice that the silence was really okay. He knew everything I wanted to say to him and I knew what he would say to me. Those hours of silence were peaceful and fullfilling just being there and sitting next to him.

My grandfather's life for the most part is a mystery to me. What I know are the things my mother has told me and even her knowledge is limited. He had experienced so much tragedy in his life that he didn't talk much about his past to anyone. Details are hard to come by but what I know is that throughout his time here on earth he had experienced the horrors of war, the hardships of extreme poverty, the loss of his first wife, the loss of three sons ranging from 2 years old to adult, having to take care of my ailing grandmother, experiencing his own sicknesses and much more. What I also know is that he was extremely hard working, completely dedicated to his family, generous with everything he had, and one of the kindest people I've ever known. I am proud to be his granddaughter. I will miss him dearly, but he has gone to be free from pain and to be with his boys in heaven.

I am so grateful for the time I was able to spend with him sitting next to him in the last few months of his life. I am so grateful for my knowledge of the gospel and the plan of salvation and for my belief without a shadow of doubt that I will see him again some day and he will be whole and healthy and we will be able to speak the words that we couldn't before.

Until then Ojiichan, God be with you til we meet again.